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[ website | Cal State Long Beach ]
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(no subject) [Dec. 16th, 2003|10:25 am]
My New Journal

Go add me then leave me a comment. :)
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(no subject) [Dec. 10th, 2003|01:30 pm]
[mood |bouncybouncy]
[music |People's Court]

Your smile brings me mine.
Your touch makes me feel.
Silence is golden but intelligence is priceless.
I sit here looking at you but I am not not with you.
I count the seconds till I see you.
I miss you.
It has only been 13 and a half hours and I miss you so much.
Til tonight darling, til tonight.
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Hmmm... [Dec. 6th, 2003|05:10 am]
[mood |calmcalm]
[music |Elements of the Outer Realm - Radiance]

I have been afraid to post anything about my life lately, at least my personal life. The truth is that over the last 6 days I have met someone, someone that I laugh with, someone whom I can just look into her eyes and see things, so many emotions. I am not afraid, I am proud to be with this girl, I want show everyone how happy I am to be with her. I know that I just got out of a relationship, an incredibably unhealthy, and to be frank, one that more or less shouldn't have started to begin with. It has been only six days but we have sent major portions of eachday together in some form or another. I know that she is a past ex's best friend. I had no intentions of it working this way, but it did, and I am so happy that I met this girl. There is something I wanted to share with everyone...

As you and I sit here, I can feel nothing but happiness. I love the way you look at me, the way you kiss me, and the way you hold me.

Last night was the most wonderful night ever. I am so incredibably happy to be your girlfriend. I am so excited for us....for the possibilities...

I hope you enjoy our date tomorrow. :)

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(no subject) [Dec. 5th, 2003|09:24 am]
[mood |enthralledenthralled]
[music |15-dmx- x gonna give it to ya -]

Have you ever had one of those days where you don't want to wake up? Where everything is fucked and everyone sucks? But you really don't know why but you want to rip someone's head off?

Well, today is the exact fucking opposite. I want to wake up, the sooner I wake up the sooner I get to see people I really care about. Nothing is fucked and no one sucks. I want to give everyone in my life a hug so that they can feel the warmth and goodness that I am feeling right now. I can't wait for tonight, I can't wait for later today, I just can't wait to get my ish done and give a couple special people in my life a ring and see what we are going to do this afternoon and tonight.

Side Note: <.Insert a clever colloquialism about how cryptic posts blow.>

"No eating here tonight. There's no eating here tonight. You're on a dieeeeeeeeet"
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(no subject) [Dec. 4th, 2003|08:01 pm]
[mood |Feeling things I haven't felt in some time, and some things that I never have felt.]

Well, my LJ will now only allow LJ users to post. In light of a flurry of juvenille comments all calling me a pig or telling me to engage in sexual intercourse with my sister. The fact that people can lower to such an immature level is quite comical, though the comments made me laugh, the content needs not to be present in my journal. And Luz if you had anything to do with the comments, it just confirms things I have always thought about you.

Side Note: I am having the best time of my life, people are actually here for me and caring about me as much as I care about them. It is a wonderful feeling and ever human should deserve to feel what I feel right now.

To my B.E.G.: I haven't felt so good with someone in a long time. I am ecstatic that we make one another feel the same. Our adopted daughter is so precious too isn't she? I love our daughter.
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It's just like........ [Dec. 3rd, 2003|10:13 am]
[mood |ecstaticecstatic]
[music |hday2001-3-18d1t02-sbd.shn]

Campbell's Soup MMMMM.....MMMMM.........GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!
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(no subject) [Dec. 2nd, 2003|09:47 am]
[mood |Confident]
[music |The Hampster running on the wheel in my head]

I can't believe you had the balls to come over, I can't believe you were that drunk and drove. I can't believe how incredibly pathetic you came off to be last night. I wished didn't open the door, I didn't know it was you. I thought it was my friend who left 10 minutes earlier. I am so glad that my friend didn't see you. Things like that are the reason you need help, the bottle is not a therapist. I never loved you, I couldn't, I wouldn't. Last night was a disgrace, it makes me revel in the fact that I know my body and my limits and what i am like when I drink. It makes me glad that I don't get that way when I drink. No one should be the way you were, no one should cheapen themselves like that. I so very much wanted to be a support for you but you pushed me away, you got mad, you cost me friends, that in the long run were healthy for me to lose. You brought clarity into my life, a model of what I don't need in my life. The drama, the HS like drama. You knew me for a month and a half, you couldn't have loved me to deeply as you say. I just don't see you as that type of person, i don't know how such a "cold person" as you put it is capable of such a large amount of love as you say you have for me. I don't need your love, I don't want it. I don't want to have to call the police, but if what happened last night ever happens again, I will be forced to have to. You need help, not love, not a man, not sex, not booze, but real help, professional help.

There is only one girl that I have ever loved, and as the days go on, I more and more believe that it was a true love that I had for her. A love that just was not meant to be. Kerry, I was in love with you, this I am so very sure of, and I will still always love you, but us as a couple we just weren't meant to be. We are looking for two very different things. We are two different people when it comes down to it.

It is finally time for me to be happy, happy with my new friends, well one new and one renewed friendship. They are so lovely. I am thankful for them.....love is real with you guys, I feel it. Thanks you two.....*raises glass* here is to many a good time.
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About time... [Nov. 28th, 2003|08:34 am]
I just got my pay check direct deposited this morning and now my bank account can finally breath. I got a nice $320 check and I get to work the beverage cart and the busiest golf days of the year, so hopefully I get some tip money from that, and by tip money I mean I hope to walk with at least 60 today....we'll see.
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Haha.... [Nov. 27th, 2003|04:55 pm]
[mood |anxiousanxious]

Awww...my sister Jen really knows how to get into the Thanksgiving Day spirit!!
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Poem I forgot I wrote.... [Nov. 27th, 2003|08:06 am]
[mood |soresore]
[music |Starfish and Coffee - Matt Nathanson]

Your touch, your presence, consumes me
With every look, every kiss, I am completed
From a subtle hug to a passionate squeeze, all have their place
The hardships, the troubles, the fights, matter not
We are together and that is all that matters in the end
We have one another, "us" is all that is needed
The emotions, the feelings, all are a part
Of a bigger picure, a bigger meaning
That which we may not realize or even reach
But it is there, it is inherent
It is underlying, it drives us to do what we do
It motivates us, it drives our inner beings
Kindness, love, compassion, sincerity
These are all we need
These are what makes life worth living
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